I always swore I would never ever say an ex down graded after they got into a relationship after ours. I hated when other girls did it but he down graded. There I said it. Does it make me feel any better about myself? I’m not gonna lie. It does. Just a hair. Does it make me feel like a terrible person? Yes. Do I want him back? No way. Moving on. saw the doctor today turns out I have been taking the wrong dose of seroquel the whole time…the fuq? Apparently that’s why I have been so angry and having such bad headaches. He upped my dosage of both meds so hopefully I start feeling results. Right now I’m definitely falling asleep typing this. my main goal is to find my inner peace and joy. That’s all I want thus year. Is that so much to ask for. tomorrow I want to make a list of my goals. One of which is writing a novel.
anxiety
oh the feelings…
So I see my psychiatrist tomorrow. Yay? Eh…. I just got diagnosed with asthma after my 3rd time of bring sick with bronchitis in less than a year (twice in 3 months). I’m more so concerned about how I’m going to bring up to my doctor how I’m worried about my anxiety levels due to the ocd. things have definitely escalated and I’m nit picking things I have never nit picked before. I’m hoping maybe he can give me something that can help me cope with my stress levels at work. At home I am typically good. The last couple of weeks I have been useless everywhere because of how crappy I have felt. I have had trouble breathing and everything. I’m just glad to have finally figured out the cause for those problems. On a better note size 2xl pajama pants no longer fit me. At all. Like they completely fall off. That kinda made me happy. It’s weird though because I still need to lose 130 pounds. It’s the small steps though.
foreverlostnotfound 